I am 17 and I have not showered in at least a month. Is this bad?
I am going to respond in a way that is not going to be cruel to you, as many answers you have received are. They are telling you that either you have a mental disorder or that what you are doing is offensive to others. These could be true, but let me fill in a bit more so that you can work this out.
First, I understand. Many people are not keeping up with grooming like they would have before COVID. Women go without makeup for days. You may be tempted not to brush your hair for a few days or change your clothing. When we don’t have a social force telling us to wash up, people tend to get a bit lazy.
This could be something as simple as, well, no one is going to see me anyway, so what’s the difference? After all, we are supposed to maintain a six-foot radius from other people, out of range of their noses. Plus, most are wearing masks, so they are simply smelling their own breath. If there was ever a time you could get away with not showering, now is certainly the time.
You could be talking yourself out of it. I knew a couple of guys who would convince themselves that they didn’t have time for self-care.
Also, it’s winter, so I am not certain if this is a factor for you. My entire family has been very tired, and even the dogs are sleeping more because of the poor weather. It can become easy to get unmotivated during the winter time, when all you want to do is binge-watch Netflix, eat stew, and roam around in your favorite PJs and slippers.
As a counselor, one woman I treated was always unwashed. She had a lot of problems with paranoia and such, but she also did not seem to wash up. I learned why, eventually: she had no running water or heat in her house.
I have also seen people neglect their self-care when they are smoking a lot of pot, for example.
One thing that you need to keep in mind is that self-care is neglected when people are suffering from issues such as drug addiction, depression, and other health challenges. As a matter of fact, when therapist assess new clients, the first thing they do is take a look at the person’s appearance for unwashed hair, unbrushed teeth, odor, messy clothing, or anything else that could indicate that the person is being challenged with keeping up with their hygiene.
It doesn’t have to be that reason. People just go through funks at times, and it doesn’t have to mean that you are suffering from depression. This is not something that happens suddenly. The criteria for diagnosis of these conditions is usually over a longer period of time than a few weeks. Also, if it’s the only thing that is going on, it’s not enough to determine a diagnosis of depression.
My best advice is to see what is going on in your life. Wintertime blues and COVID could be responsible, but also, gauge your mood. Are you going through a difficult time right now? Did something major happen that has upset you? Do you feel fed up? Are you just feeling lazy and don’t know why? It could indicate depression, but it could also just be the fact that you are not getting enough sunlight in the winter, which could zap your energy and motivation.
With some introspection, you could get to the source. Think of our behaviors as the evidence of something going on, a personal issue. When people yell, they have had verbal abuse in their childhood, for example. A behavior you are questioning (which is really great, by the way, that you are doing this) could indicate a deeper, unresolved problem or a physical problem. Just keep questioning, and you can eventually find the answer.
And, of course, you can always seek counseling if you need help. Have your parents arrange an appointment for you if you need to speak with someone.
EDIT: Hi Everyone. Thanks for participating in this discussion. I want to clarify a couple of things. One, I did not imply that all people suffering from drug addiction do not wash regularly. In my experience out of the people I have known, I did notice some who smoked pot every single day, their hair looked pretty greasy and unkempt. That was back in college. Naturally, people these days might smoke pot for medical reasons, so I get it. I think people have good points about finding other ways to wash up if they cannot take showers and baths. Also, people from other countries, it’s simply not the norm there. On the flip side, it’s true that people who cannot or do not wash up as often could get more rashes and skin infections. Whatever this teenager is going through, however, I do hope that the one thing that stood out was that we can all be kinder and more understanding of each other, and the way to do that is to suspend judgment. We don’t really know what’s going on in another person’s life, and judgment leveled at another human being can be really hurtful, and if the people who are dishing out were to be on the receiving end of it, I’m sure they would not be very happy about it. I thank you for your comments and thoughts.
https://www.quora.com/I-am-17-and-I-have-not-showered-in-at-least-a-month-Is-this-bad/answer/Kirsten-Schuder?ch=15&oid=264821948&share=e4bb3a18&srid=5KxEM&target_type=answer
I am 17 and I have not showered in at least a month. Is this bad?
I am going to respond in a way that is not going to be cruel to you, as many answers you have received are. They are telling you that either you have a mental disorder or that what you are doing is offensive to others. These could be true, but let me fill in a bit more so that you can work this out.
First, I understand. Many people are not keeping up with grooming like they would have before COVID. Women go without makeup for days. You may be tempted not to brush your hair for a few days or change your clothing. When we don’t have a social force telling us to wash up, people tend to get a bit lazy.
This could be something as simple as, well, no one is going to see me anyway, so what’s the difference? After all, we are supposed to maintain a six-foot radius from other people, out of range of their noses. Plus, most are wearing masks, so they are simply smelling their own breath. If there was ever a time you could get away with not showering, now is certainly the time.
You could be talking yourself out of it. I knew a couple of guys who would convince themselves that they didn’t have time for self-care.
Also, it’s winter, so I am not certain if this is a factor for you. My entire family has been very tired, and even the dogs are sleeping more because of the poor weather. It can become easy to get unmotivated during the winter time, when all you want to do is binge-watch Netflix, eat stew, and roam around in your favorite PJs and slippers.
As a counselor, one woman I treated was always unwashed. She had a lot of problems with paranoia and such, but she also did not seem to wash up. I learned why, eventually: she had no running water or heat in her house.
I have also seen people neglect their self-care when they are smoking a lot of pot, for example.
One thing that you need to keep in mind is that self-care is neglected when people are suffering from issues such as drug addiction, depression, and other health challenges. As a matter of fact, when therapist assess new clients, the first thing they do is take a look at the person’s appearance for unwashed hair, unbrushed teeth, odor, messy clothing, or anything else that could indicate that the person is being challenged with keeping up with their hygiene.
It doesn’t have to be that reason. People just go through funks at times, and it doesn’t have to mean that you are suffering from depression. This is not something that happens suddenly. The criteria for diagnosis of these conditions is usually over a longer period of time than a few weeks. Also, if it’s the only thing that is going on, it’s not enough to determine a diagnosis of depression.
My best advice is to see what is going on in your life. Wintertime blues and COVID could be responsible, but also, gauge your mood. Are you going through a difficult time right now? Did something major happen that has upset you? Do you feel fed up? Are you just feeling lazy and don’t know why? It could indicate depression, but it could also just be the fact that you are not getting enough sunlight in the winter, which could zap your energy and motivation.
With some introspection, you could get to the source. Think of our behaviors as the evidence of something going on, a personal issue. When people yell, they have had verbal abuse in their childhood, for example. A behavior you are questioning (which is really great, by the way, that you are doing this) could indicate a deeper, unresolved problem or a physical problem. Just keep questioning, and you can eventually find the answer.
And, of course, you can always seek counseling if you need help. Have your parents arrange an appointment for you if you need to speak with someone.
EDIT: Hi Everyone. Thanks for participating in this discussion. I want to clarify a couple of things. One, I did not imply that all people suffering from drug addiction do not wash regularly. In my experience out of the people I have known, I did notice some who smoked pot every single day, their hair looked pretty greasy and unkempt. That was back in college. Naturally, people these days might smoke pot for medical reasons, so I get it. I think people have good points about finding other ways to wash up if they cannot take showers and baths. Also, people from other countries, it’s simply not the norm there. On the flip side, it’s true that people who cannot or do not wash up as often could get more rashes and skin infections. Whatever this teenager is going through, however, I do hope that the one thing that stood out was that we can all be kinder and more understanding of each other, and the way to do that is to suspend judgment. We don’t really know what’s going on in another person’s life, and judgment leveled at another human being can be really hurtful, and if the people who are dishing out were to be on the receiving end of it, I’m sure they would not be very happy about it. I thank you for your comments and thoughts.
https://www.quora.com/I-am-17-and-I-have-not-showered-in-at-least-a-month-Is-this-bad/answer/Kirsten-Schuder?ch=15&oid=264821948&share=e4bb3a18&srid=5KxEM&target_type=answer